On April 20th, during protests against the Summit of the Americas, Jaggi Singh was nabbed by undercover police and charged with several offenses, the most serious being possession of a dangerous weapon.

The weapon in question was an enormous catapult used to launch helpless teddy bears across the security perimeter. Those responsible for this heinous crime have denied that Singh had anything to do with their glorious catapult, and today will be sending in signed confessions of guilt to the authorities, and turning in their stuffed comrades to local police stations across the country. Meanwhile, Singh has been denied bail, and will be held for several months until his trial.

DIST, the group behind the catapult action, has also learned that Singh and other political prisoners are being denied conjugal visits. Needless to say, this is a clear violation of the Geneva Convention, and DIST has asked that Amnesty International investigate this terrible abuse of human rights.

DIST is also announcing a campaign of teddy bear rage aimed at freeing the prisoners captured during the Summit of the Americas. They are asking people to catch as many stuffed animals as they can, and mail them to Le Grande Fromage, Jean Chretien (this can be done free of charge), and to Quebec Justice Minister Paul Begin (addresses below).

In order to encourage the public to send in their stuffed animals, DIST has sent out a fake press release and set up a fake web page, announcing a teddy bear exchange program, similar to the gun exchanges which occur in the United States.

DIST is demanding the following:

1) We want our catapult back!
2) Free Jaggi Singh and other POW's
3) Conjugal visits for all political prisoners
4) Worldwide revolution with eternal grooviness as its only goal

We ask that people turn in their stuffed animals until all demands are met.

Emails of rage can be sent to: paul.begin/depute/pq@assnat.qc.ca

More information can be found at http://tao.ca/

--------------------- fake press release-----------------------

For Immediate Release Wednesday, May 2nd

Last week, during the Summit of Americas, citizens of this country were shocked to see teddy bears being launched from a catapult at our brave security forces. While our police were protected by their riot armour (thankfully!), we feel it is incumbent upon us to ensure that never again, will the lives of our officers be put in jeopardy by teddy bear violence. One of the suspected catapulters has been apprehended, and we will spare no effort to ensure that he is brought to justice.

However, the prosecution of those involved in this act of teddy terror is not enough. Today, the Justice Department is announcing a new program to get dangerous teddy bears off the streets. For the safety of our children, and for the safety of all, we need to act.

Today, we are kick-starting our teddy bear exchange program. We ask that our fellow citizens send us their teddy bears, in exchange for items ranging from tear gas canisters, to batons, to AK47's.

We do not seek to ban teddy bears. We know that good, law-abiding citizens sometimes own teddy bears for legitimate purposes. Rather, we seek to reduce the number of teddy bears out there, to ensure that a plague of teddy bear atrocities will not infect this great country of ours.

It is astounding that anyone can walk into a thrift shop, Salvation Army or toy store, and buy, without a license, or background check, as many stuffed animals as they want. That is why we are working with Parliament, to enact strong teddy bear legislation, to ensure that teddy bears do not fall into the hands of criminals. More importantly, we will continue to enforce existing teddy bear control laws, in order to stem the tide of teddy-violence.

In the meantime, we implore our fellow citizens to send in their stuffed animals. Canadians can mail them for free to: Stop Teddy Violence c/o Jean Chretien, Le Grande Fromage House of Commons, Ottawa Ontario

Or those with money can send them to:

Paul Begin Justice Ministry
1200 Route de L'Eglise, 9th Floor
Ste. Foy, PQ G1V 4M1

Sincerely,
Paul Begin,
Minister of Justice

NOTE: A photo of the "glorious catapult" in action, can be seen at http://www.quebec.indymedia.org/mediaupload/1245_a.jpg

The above message and fake media release were forwarded to you by:

Richard Sanders
Coordinator, Coalition to Oppose the Arms Trade (COAT)
Editor, Press for Conversion!
541 McLeod St., Ottawa Ontario Canada K1R 5R2

Tel.: 613-231-3076
Fax: 613-231-2614