The bad news just rolls on and on

April 12, 2006

Newspaper Headline: "Bad news just rolls off Bush"

Thus did Steve Kraske congratulate President Bush in an April 25, 2004, Kansas City Star editorial. The bad news just keeps rolling along, but now the President's approval rating is almost as low as President Truman's was during the Korean War - several Congressmen were crying for his impeachment.

"Bush has elevated his standing among the American people," declared Mr. Kraske, "at the same time he's had to claw his way through a morass of bad news.... How's Bush doing it? ... Part of the answer is the president's $40 million ad blitz." He notes that the first ad was an attack on Kerry's double-talking. And there is another factor: "Bush appears to have an unwavering bloc of support.... Democrats head into the spring now knowing that Bush can take a hit. He's become a president with a sheen of Ronald Reagan Teflon."

A "slew of bad news" would have sounded much better, but then we would not have had the image implied, of the creature from the black lagoon who, after shedding his gills for lungs and his fins for claws some time ago, by natural law descended into the Bush family, where he as a matter of course grew teeth with a natural structure almost identical to the fins of one of his founding fathers, the shark.

After having his mouth washed out with soap several times for hurling racial epithets at his underprivileged brothers, our hero of evolution clawed his way up the career ladder, where he is now distinguished by several successes. He got into Yale by virtue of the alumni quota system; while there he fought off the intellectuals, winning his degree in neoconservative regressivism. He became a jet pilot and avoided the war, substituting gallant public service instead - chasing white girls and campaigning for a racist politician. The demigod courageously struggled with Demon Alcohol and was saved by his political hero, for whose sake he renounced Darwin and became one of his Almighty's elect.

The creature with shining scales helped his dad and his dad's boss foster survival of the fittest among gun and dope dealers, serial killers, mass murderers, and the like. He got into the oil business and courageously struggled to get out just in time, with a handsome gain. He was groomed to make war on Iraq.

To make a long struggle short, he went from slime to the White House, taking his dynasty's wolfish court with him for the perpetuation of further crimes against humanity, including pre-emptive blitzkriegs to save the world whether it likes it or not, for might, before all, makes right.

Mr. Kraske's analogy made sense as far as Teflon goes. George W. Bush, Jr. has inherited a Teflon coat. But he is no Teflon Reagan, at least not yet, nor is this frustrated thug the Teflon Don whom Reagan-Bush & Friends admire so much while he fights everyone else's crime at home; he does not fight it abroad where the jungle law he naturally prefers still predominates. Not only is there no longer any honor amongst organized criminals today, the mobsters have regressed to killing children and women - killing Kali's women led to the downfall of the original Thugs. Although Junior Bush follows in Reagan's footsteps, he is certainly not a great communicator; he is not an actor who can glibly mouth plagiarized platitudes when propped up on stage. As we can see from the reams of Bushisms, the Bush dynasty does not rule by logical argument. The Bush knaves rule by illogical treachery and irrational force.

Not that I would single out the Bush family as the most egregious house of organized crime - I merely respond to Mr. Kraske's addle-headed admiration for the gangster in the White House. I don't admire him. He is a two-bit hoodlum compared to Reagan and Gotti. But his body count is already much higher, and it may eventually exceed that of his father and hit-man Saddam. Fortunately for us, we can read bad news about the gangster who misleads the United States. Such was not allowed under hit-man Saddam. Yet now that Saddam is gone, we should take note that our godfather, with the strongest military in the world at his command, with all his talk about Almighty God, has thus far not been able to do what hit-man Saddam did in Iraq, keep peace through organized terror. That bad news should not roll off our backs, regardless of the fact that the president has a large bloc of blockheads supporting him. Hopefully addled-headed Mr. Kraske is no longer one of them.

Note: perfluorooctanoic acid (PFOA), used to produce Teflon, has been identified as a toxic substance. It has polluted the population, particularly in the West where Teflon cookware is popular.