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Column E

Anonyme, Saturday, July 3, 2010 - 07:57

Sudhama Ranganathan

Trying to be all things to all people is a fruitless pursuit for so many reasons. There are so many ways to lose oneself, and so few paths lead to what’s right. There are only a few ways to feel sincere about who we are as after spreading ourselves thin for too long it’s easy to feel our sense of self ebb. Fitting into every one of life’s little columns is impossible.

We often run into situations where we find ourselves unable to comprehend why someone else, let’s say in ‘column e’ as a hypothetical, thinks or feels a certain way. We may find at those moments we question who we are relative to the issue and where we ourselves fall. We may wonder if we too fall into that category. We may find our beliefs stretch across multiple sections and columns. We may find ourselves creating new columns, because for where we take a stand there really aren’t any which have been created.

Sometimes we discover ourselves in a situation wherein a majority of those around us seem to fit into ‘column e,’ and not fitting there ourselves leaves us feeling on the outskirts. Here people around us just feel differently than we do on some issue. Whether we decide to vocalize our differences or not, to maintain our stance in whatever appropriate way helps to feel most on balance is almost never the wrong thing.

We may learn something that influences a change or not, but maintaining a healthy sense of self throughout is always okay.

There may be pressure to be forced into way of thinking which we simply don’t agree with. That’s just life. That’s just the stuff we have to deal with. There are always places of balance. There are always those spots that make for bearable compromises until we find a better place for ourselves.

Fitting in and knowing a place among our peers is one thing. Most of us just can’t go out and do whatever we want. In fact almost no one can. That doesn’t mean we can’t believe what we feel most deeply about the kind of people we are and our world view.

Even if it seems the trendy thing to do this year that doesn’t mean it’s right for all of us. It doesn’t mean it will be something long lasting or permanent. In fact trends are usually just that and transient by nature. Often times we discover those trends were more hype and bright coloring than substance. It’s those things deep down that keep our feet planted and rooted in the ground which almost never fail us.

Those kernels deep down that are the seeds for so much growing before us as we walk our paths are those things which help us understand who we are. They are the guideposts and reminders acknowledging the presence of who we are deep down as individuals even if it’s only ourselves who recognize them. Those things help us to be understood by others whether they are readily apparent to the world or not. Those things are often our statements unspoken but somehow seen.

When we look at what’s ahead for ourselves in terms of choices and start to feel the script has already been written for us and we may as well go this way or that - those hidden pieces of the puzzle allow us to make the tough decisions that we feel best we can live with. We never have to blindly walk in with nothing to guide us.

Just when we think we have, we find it’s those things deep inside we never even realized were there which gave us the courage to go our own way. It’s those moments where we did what we felt was most right that we see what was lying there below products of those hidden seeds, and help us to mark where we stand, where we’ve been and where we will be going.

Choices are never best when made for us. Even when we decide to do what’s laid out in ‘column e’ it’s hopefully after consciously choosing. Even if the choice is a blind leap of faith. Following that path we feel drawn to most is always a choice. For that path there will always be the opportunity to bring who we are inside to the task at hand. But, in the end we simply can’t all fit into ‘column e.’

To read about my inspiration for this article go to www.lawsuitagainstuconn.com.

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